In his own mind, he was grown up and was looking for his chance to prove it. For the first time in his young life, he saw the world be cruel to his friend. Not knowing how to help, he followed his gut feeling. Standing in front of a single-story house the long-haired teenager realized how difficult it was to press the doorbell.
The door opened seemingly on its own. A woman in her eighties, wise beyond her years came into his focus. She smiled, somehow it was the warmest most contagious smile he would ever know. That is what had brought him here, the lack of judgment. Only someone who you are a part of will give you that forever.
“You caught me right in the middle of cutting onions.” She spoke softly. Her voice was always soft, even when she yelled. “Why don’t you take off your shoes and come to help me?”
He nodded, unsure of what to say. He began to unlace his Harley Davidson boots. A sign that his father loved him much more than he ever knew. He looked disheveled at best, and homeless at worst. The young man woke up each school day wanting to go build something in his vocational auto class. He had not built anything that worked.
He knew to wash his hands thoroughly. He tied his hair back, making sure to get a bit of water on it so it looked sleeker.
“Did you fight with your dad again?”
“Yeah, but that is not what this is about.” He hung his head and looked for something to fidget with.
“Look, even if you do not want to tell me just help me out a little. That may benefit you more than you know. You are a pro at washing and peeling potatoes.” She was not lying, he liked all types of food enough to help prepare them. He started to scrub potatoes in the sink with a sponge. Soon he was done peeling them, he moved onto chopping. The two made dinner in silence.
“Look, this is not about me. You will think it is, but it is not.” A long pause was met with silence. She waited on him to continue. “How do you help someone?”
The question was very opened ended. She knew enough to keep her answer open-ended. “Well, first of all, don’t try to solve all the person’s problems. You can’t, they will just go find new ones. Help them out just a little bit. Give them a ride, hear them out and agree with them.” She stopped to make sure he seemed to be listening.
“Right, he don’t listen.” The young man’s voice tone changed. Now he seemed upset. She knew he was being honest and it was not about him.
“See you are trying to be a hero, fix everything. Let me ask you something if you did that then what?”
“He would just mess something else up.”
“He would owe you for fixing his problems. No one really wants to live in debt to another. He would grow to hate and resent you. That is why he put the wall up in the first place.”
The young man had begun rinsing out the sink. Again he had no idea what to say. Apparently he could not help his friend. At that moment he thought about storming out, but that would hurt his grandma. The frizzy-haired teenage boy was not alright with that.
“So how do you help?” She continued. “Think of it like this, be a mirror.”
That made him turn his head directly at her for the first time all day. She knew what to say next.
“Be a mirror. Show him how funny he is, talk about something that was cool he did. Don’t tell him what to do or what to think. That will just make him mad. Let him be wrong, let him be honest.” The stew was on the stove. “Like for instance if you started crying right now I would say it was the onions. I would not put that on you. That would just make you feel even worse than you already do.”
“Yeah but this is serious.” Said a boy who somehow now seemed a bit older.
“Be his mirror. Talk about something he did along time ago that was awesome. Talk about when he was right. That is what no one else is doing. He does not need a superhero like in those games you always play. He needs to see who he can be and how he is.” She paused again. “What do you look in each day when you get ready? What shows you who you are?”
The young man in an old Nine Inch Nails shirt had begun to look out the window. That was good, it meant he heard something.
“When you talk to him next talk about everything other than that thing. Let him bring it up; he will. Counter whatever he says with something he said or did. Let that man find strength in himself.”
His ponytail bounced as he nodded. In his own mind, he wondered if he would ever fix anything. Each day he tried, he just never got there. Not yet at least. They shared a much-needed hug.
His grandmother’s words hit home. Somehow, he would figure out how to be a mirror to anyone that needs one. He will never give up on life. He will never give up on love. All because of his grandmother, who was his mirror when he needed one the most.